So, I am left here, in Yakima, alone and in reflection. Just about a year ago around this exact same time I was making this same commitment to my best friend. I sat on the exact same couch I'm currently on, writing to Andy. Unable to sleep in (seriously uncharacteristic of me) I woke, wrapped myself in my robe and sat with the early sun, a pen and some paper and just wrote. Later my mom would enter the front room of the home I spent my high school years growing in and came home to during the summers between college and ask me if I needed anything, "coffee? tea? what are you doing?" After a couple questions and one too many interruptions I had to tell her to leave-ha! She understood and gave me my quiet. Then within a couple hours it was go time!
I jumped into the shower anxiously awaiting my sister's arrival. She was late. I was irritated. It was my wedding day!!! I continued on to call those who were supposed to show up to help with set up and printed out a number of "direction sheets" to make sure things were just perfect. Once Lis arrived and finished showering I quickly chewed her out and we headed out to get our hair done. My aunt and her best friend (my second aunt:) Arleen Harmon) were waiting at the salon for us-excited, hooting and hollering with the camera and hair spray ready! Lis quickly got me coffee and candy and the BMs started to arrive. The day had begun...this incredible day full of feelings and experiences one NEVER could have imagined.
I wonder if other brides have the same experience as I did. If they can't help but keep their FB profile pic wedding pics only....mainly because nothing else compares and all they want, like me, is to relive that day. I think about Katelyn who has made a schedule down to 15-30 minute increments of time and Aimee who found her soon-to-be husband Des and well frankly hasn't ever seemed as happy as she is when she's around him (at least to me). Are they anxious, nervous, excited? I do not know but I hope their days are as memorable and life-changing as mine.
Recently I had lunch with Kathy Starr, a close and wonderful family friend. She asked me what marriage has been like for me. I answered as best I could while thinking to myself that we could spend all of lunch talking about what marriage, something I've dreamed about literally my entire life, (I know...all girls say that...but I really, genuinely have imagined what having a life partner, a friend who would never leave me and love me forever would be like), has been like for me. I told her it's been completely different than I thought. That it's true what they say, marriage is work, lots of work. I told her that even after knowing Andy and spending EVERY day with him for years, after we got married I found out so much more about him...I've learned and am still learning Andy who is a person more full of stuff....things...to learn, to see, to get to know, to deal with, to love and all of the above, than I ever could have imagined. And as I think of all we've experienced in the past year I am able to reflect on what I still say (and people keep telling me, 'wait til' you have kids!!") was the best day of my life.
Andy and I have fought more so than I have with anyone else, we've experienced things-traveled, moved, organized, worked, slept, woke, napped, watched, cleaned, and the list goes on-, we've purchased our first home, we've seen our loved ones make the same commitment we have and been able to look at one another and say, "hey remember when we did this??" with big smiles on our faces and now, one year later I can reflect upon this time and upon us with a big smile on my face. What a huge blessing.
I have become someone through marriage that I love at times and hate at times. I now know now what it means to have a best friend as a husband. I now know now what loving unconditionally means (even when I don't practice it!) and I believe I will continue to learn and come to "know" for the rest of my life.
So here, here's to Aimee and Des and Katelyn and Adam. May God bless both these couples as He has Andy and I and may these couples never feel the same.
Peace and Love.